this has no title

22Sep09

you ever have that feeling of uneasiness? where you can’t sleep but you want to?you feel light headed but you fight that urge to close your eyes? it’s almost 5 am while im typing this. I have a piano version of BoA’s every heart playing in the background. I think adrenaline is pumping in, you feel all surreal and you start thinking of so many things.

you start to think, what to do tomorrow, deadlines, you start to shiver some uneasy feeling of nothingness, where is my life headed and then, sayonara solitia starts playing. (totally inappropriate but im typing in real time)

anyways, back to that surreal feeling of being tired, groggy and lacking any rest. as far as anyone’s concern its pretty bothersome. i don’t have any deadlines, why i don’t sleep is by choice. alot of times i feel empty, like a shell….aching to crack open like a spontaneous firecracker. it’s just a depressing feeling, sometimes…i just want to drop down into a deep slumber. a chaotic mess within the depths of a labyrinth, a soul, a charred remain of oneself. guide me through…as the piano plays , as people murmur, as friendships stutter…

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